when your coworker tries to scare you as you come out of the washroom, but she’s the one who’ll suffer as you’ve only had eggs and potatoes for lunch today.

RIP


  • me: may I get your name on the cup?
  • customer: yeah, it's Guy: g-u-y.
  • me: *screams internally*

I’ve been busy making lattes and lifting heavy things nowadays. Like, I can slap my titty and it’ll actually jiggle!


😊.

😊.


Happy one month to us, bub!

Happy one month to us, bub!


I promised myself that my relationship with him wouldn’t be some fairy tale posted on social media and I guess I succeeded in that. Yesterday was bound to happen, but I didn’t know it would hit me so hard like the cheap shot it was. 
my lungs are heavy.

I promised myself that my relationship with him wouldn’t be some fairy tale posted on social media and I guess I succeeded in that. Yesterday was bound to happen, but I didn’t know it would hit me so hard like the cheap shot it was. 

my lungs are heavy.


SAVE HER 

SAVE HER 

(via beebunny)


my plan was to be a bitch to my dad the whole day and come back w/ an espresso machine, but I forgot to take out money and the bank is closed on Sundays.

happy father’s day: sorry I was a bitch for the whole day


(via vinladen)


how do people go from getting into a fight w/ one another then invite me to a threesome the next day 



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